There are now less than two weeks until I am required to show up at my school to work and three weeks until the first day of school. The nightmares are already beginning. Yesterday morning I dreamed that I was in my classroom, surrounded by talking students. No matter what I did, I couldn't get them to listen to me and quiet down. And I couldn't remember half the names of my students. It was traumatizing.
This summer has been wonderful, but the entire time I have felt this sense of dread whenever I thought about school starting in the fall. It's not the teaching I'm worried about. That's actually the interesting part. And despite my nightmare, I like the kids I work with, but when I think of the amount of work that goes into teaching, I want to lay on the floor in the fetal position and cry. Maybe it won't be as bad as I think. For the first time, I've finally felt able, in the last few days, to confront the piles of books and files I brought home at the end of the school year and dumped on the floor of our second bedroom. I'm sure that once I start making more definitive plans, I'll start to feel like I really can go back again.
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3 comments:
That does sound daunting. I often feel the same way about teaching music. I dread it all the way up until I'm actually doing it, then it's not so bad. Good luck with the school year!
Yep, the back to school ads are everywhere. I can't believe it's that time again. My suggestion is to make a huge (and by huge I mean poster size with large font) list of the reasons you like teaching, took this job in the first place, and what you like about this particular job, good memories from last year, excitement about this year, and post it where you can see it every single day. My friend does this only it's a gratitude list. It just helps to remind us why the heck we do the things we do.
Oh, and for the record I think you'll have a fabulous year and I wish you could be my teacher. I'll be cheering you on from Boise :)
Katie, thanks for the great advice. I think I'll have to follow it. Thanks for the vote of confidence too.
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