Adoptive Parent Training

This weekend we spent ten hours at adoptive parent training. As excited as I am to adopt again, this was another part of the process that doesn’t really make me want to shout yippee. Actually I don’t think there’s any part of the process that I really look forward to.

And my stress about our adoption application wasn’t helped any when I realized that, while making photocopies of my driver’s license and social security card for our background check, I left both of those things on a copier at FedEx Office. So in addition to applying to adopt again, “I” might be applying for several new lines of credit.

It only took me a week to realize what I had done and I did get both back. Then it took me a few more days to figure out how to put a fraud alert on my credit report. So in a few more weeks, I’ll be requesting my first credit report. I’m just loving these new experiences.

At any rate, as we went through training a second time, I kept thinking about my first experience. The first time I felt so nervous about adoption; it seemed like there were so many unknowns. And everyone who had adopted before seemed so gung-ho about adoption and I found their enthusiasm a little overwhelming.

Now I’m one of those crazy gung-ho people who feels like I can’t talk about adoption enough (in case you haven’t noticed). I try hard not to be annoying, but I want to share the joy. So yes, I’m pretty overbearing and obnoxious.

As I got to hear the stories of others who have adopted, I started to get really excited. I want that phone call at 9 pm asking me if I can fly to Tennessee, or wherever, the next day to meet a birth mom.

The training also reminded me of the nervous excitement we felt when we were told that we had been picked.

I remember the joy of having BG placed in my arms and hearing the words, “Here is your baby.”

I will always remember how happy I felt to see BG dressed in white and smiling at us as we were sealed to her.

And this training also reminded me how after waiting only a few months, I burst into tears in the temple because we hadn’t heard from a single birth mother.

I remember all too well the big purple bruise on my butt that I got when I fainted because I had been praying about my anxiety over this adoption on my bathroom floor.

How long will we wait this time before we hear anything? Will this be the time that we experience a failed adoption? I know the process better, but there are still plenty of unknowns.

This was also the first time that I heard several birth moms talk about what it was actually like to sign the relinquishment papers and then to leave after placement. Every time I hear a birth mom speak, my admiration for them grows. I am so grateful for birth moms and grateful to learn even more about what they experience. I don’t think anyone who has never placed a baby herself can really ever understand what that is like, but I’m glad that LDS Family Services works so hard to help adoptive parents be sympathetic and appreciative of birth moms. If you know a birth mom, give her a hug for me.